Short update
During the last week I joined several forums pertaining to WW II and I also joined a “writer forum”.
In all of the above I left a link to this website and/or to my book.
So, if any new followers have any questions regarding the time frame I am writing about, please feel free to chime in by using the “comment” space provided.
In the meantime I finished writing chapter 10 of “Trust do a degree” and I am pretty sure it will get published within my time line. (End of August).
In the meantime, my formatter, Chris Haas, is working to get the first book ready to be published in paperback. I will keep you informed on the progress.
Right now she is finishing the design of the front cover which will be a touch different from the eBook version.
Yesterday we* had a small challenge on our ranch to keep our animal pets comfortable.
The temperature rose to 111 degree and Jenny fabricated a “sprinkler system” . It worked . Even the pigeons gathered underneath to take a shower, very much to the annoyance of the sheep, but, this is a different story.
We* = When I write “we done this or that” Jenny always asks me : “What is this we thing?” about?
Beats me.
Hello Bill, thank you for your questions.
Your questions, Bill, are very much appreciated and I welcome this opportunity to shed some further light on the subjects you raised.
The answer to your first question is simple: NO, I have not spoken to any youth groups and you have certainly a point by suggesting to advise against blind faith.
It would be a very simple message: “Spend some time studying history. It is full of examples what happens when “blind faith turns into fanatical support”.
Your second question regarding: Did I speak out against bad happenings. Well, you identified yourself as a Jewish person and I guess that you are referring to the things which were happening during these times to people of the Jewish faith. Bill, during the 1940ties I lost most of my classmates and I am sure that there were many Jewish children among them. But, as I mentioned in the book and also here on my website: We lost classmates every week, besides parents and relatives. It was total war and people disappeared constantly.
None of us, 10 to 14 year old, noticed a difference due to individual faiths.
When I returned from Poland I spoke out against the absolute incompetency of the German school authorities. But, unless you had a dead wish you never spoke out against the SS.
Besides, Bill, please tell me : To whom could you speak out to? Your parents were gone and so were your relatives or teachers. As I reported in my book, many times I had to stop myself questioning my commanding officers.
Bill, please listen to me, we had commanding officers, when we were 14 years old ! Not school crossing guards like in the USA.
These were different times, and I guess no matter how I try to describe them ….I will miss something along the way. And the overall essence of it all…..well, you had to be there.
Book release in Germany? According to Google they sold 10 books in Germany.
Friends or relatives of the characters in Germany: No, nobody is alive or cares anymore.
My last friend, in Germany, Harold died a few years ago. He was close to 80 years old.
As far as the second and third book releases: I hope that the second book will be published by the end of August and the third before the end of the year.
And, finally, Bill, I like to thank you for your kind remarks in regard to my “moral compass”; and while I take it as a compliment I feel that the main reason for my survival was due to the fact that I knew when to keep my mouth shut.
Take good care, Bill, and if you have any other questions, please feel free to ask.
Horst
Interesting Questions
Since we had our “free” book day I received a lot of interesting questions.
Off course, there was the obvious one: “What happened to Peter and to the camp group that took the train?”
Well, I never heard from them again. Apparently the train never arrived in Kottbus. In the weeks of February and March, also in the beginning of April 1945, the Polish underground was very successful in sabotaging the rail road lines leading from Poland to Germany. Supply trains and hospital trains were their prime target and were often totally destroyed .
I made constant inquiries and contacted all the pertinent agencies: School authorities, Churches and the German Red Cross.
Their answers was always the same: “What do you want from us? It is total war! ”
The German Red Cross was the worst: “Don’t ask question. Be happy that you are alive. Why don’t you grab a Panzerfaust and blow up a tank? Get out of here!”
And the answers from the churches? Well. you don’t want to know…. in Berlin April 1945, it was total chaos and if I write that everyone cared only for himself, then I am being very kind.
So, I don’t know what happened to Peter and his group. Many German families provided shelter for the homeless children and adopted them later on. So, there is a slight chance that some of them survived.
Another obvious question: “What about the package from the submarine commander?”
Answer: Will be explained in the second book.
But many of the questions asked, centered about the time frame and events before 1945 :
“How come so many children rotted on their parents?
What was the difference between the SS and the other German armed forces.?
Did all the German cities evacuated the children due to air attacks?
What was the difference between the Soviet fighting troops and the other allied forces?
Did the Germans really loved Hitler before the war?
What was the difference between loyalty to the fatherland, and being fanatic?
How were the left handed children treated? (Well, they were beaten on the left hand until it was swollen and bloody, and until the “stupid moron of a child” learned how to write with the right hand)
Because of these and many other questions regarding the years before the war, I decided to write a “prequel”, covering the years 1940 to 1945.
Again, I will write from memory and from the perspective of a boy who was required, to join the Junkvolk by the age of 10. ( In Berlin it was required by law)
Two days ago I finished my outline. I am planning to publish it between the second and the third book. But, this might change, depending upon any further questions I might receive.
Please keep them coming.
“Free book day”
A week ago my computer went on strike. All of the sudden I had nothing but pop ups and crazy advertising asking me to buy diapers, life insurance, a burial plot and enroll in a college education program. This did not really bother me because I do not use the internet too much. The only email I answer is from Wanda my editor, and Chris my formatter and promoter.
Oh, yes, I also answer a few of my friends and my daughter. But this is about the extend of it. All the other emails hang around for a few days until I move them to the garbage bin. However, my computer got serious in his desire to die. My word processor slowed down to a crawl. I was unable to copy and paste and finally it took me over 15 minutes to access my files.
Sure, I could possibly make him well again by taking him to a local computer guru, a lady who had revived him before, but, I was also tired of coaching the old “Vista” OS back to life. I was told that windows 8 stinks and that I should try to buy windows 7. Since I don’t know anything about computers anyhow, I did not think that this could be an issue.
So, I went ahead and bought windows 8 and since the computers don’t come anymore with a software bundle I also bought the word processing software from Microsoft. Then I took the old and the new computer to my trusted “computer angel” to transfer the pertinent files from the old one to the new one, and Bingo, four days later (that was yesterday) I had the new computer working and I could write again.
In the meantime, Chris my promoter lady, informed me that on June 11th and 12th we had a free book day, on kindle select scheduled. Ouch, today is the 11th and because of all the above I had not posted this free day on my author’s (this one here) website.
So, I do it herewith, you still have tomorrow the 12th of June, a chance to download my first book for free. (You’re welcome)
Please help yourself and if you find the time and or the words please leave a short review on amazon. (Thank you very much)
Now, if you miss tomorrow, we will schedule another free day and this time I will let you know in a more timely manner. It is now June 11th and 8:15 pm. I just checked my stats on kindle and read to my joy that 405 readers took advantage of the free day.
Seriously, I don’t know how this happened because I am a totally unknown entity. It must be the promotional effort of Chris and Wanda my two trusted friends and of Jenny my wife who told everyone she met that I was writing a book.
Thank you Jenny, Chris and Wanda, your help and assistance is truly invaluable for me.
Hmmm yes, Windows 8 operating system : I love it. Everything is easy and absolute intuitive. At least for me it is. The professional computer gurus however bitch about it, non stop. I am glad that I am not a guru because I don’t have the luxury of time to learn “computers.” I just write because I love it. All the rest I outsource.
And, to the 405 newcomers: Thank you and Happy reading!
Working on Chapter 3
Well, I finished chapter 2 of my second book and started to write this morning number 3. This worked pretty good because I had made myself plenty of notes while I was rewriting chapter 2. The only challenge I was facing was my new little puppy.
You see, we always had big dogs and if you read my previous post you know that we still have four of them. However, we also do some dog boarding on our small ranch and during the last year I started to fall in love with the smaller breeds. They are less independant and not so aloof like the shepherds are. Whenever we get a small dog for a few days I try my very best to spoil him and always feel bad when their owners come to pick them up again. I am sad to see the little guys leave.
Sometimes I even think that the feelings are mutual because more than once it happened that the owner placed his dog in his car and before he could shut the door, the little guy sneaked out again and ran straight back to our door, and if I left the door open he was sitting next to my chair before the owner noticed that his loyal pet was gone. Now, the good thing about it is that these actions of the dogs serve to secure a nice repeat business.
However, personally I hate to see my new friends leave and Jennifer saw that I was always lonely for a day or two. So, two weeks ago she surprised with a puppy. Imagine a brand new pup just for me and to stay with me. It is a mix between a small Terrier and a Pomeranian. Cute as heck. It is a female and was 7 weeks old when I got her. Ever since then she sits next to me in front of the desk and I feed her goodies. Naturally, like all puppies, it chews whatever is in her reach and I bought her small rawhide bones and enjoy the sound of her small teeth gnawing away.
That’s where my challenge cuts in. The little puppy chewed up most of my notes. My fault, I know, I should have been watching her instead of just listening. So, instead of regrouping my thoughts and re writing the notes…. I started to write this post. Now I am back to square one.
However, I still have my puppy.
Starting The next Book
This morning started with a broken water hose, or something leaking from our van’s radiator I needed to get chicken food and filled 20 milk cartons with water and proceeded to the repair shop. Naturally, I received a few ‘fingers’ when I had to stop to refill the radiator. People are not used anymore to seeing someone trying to get a disabled car from point A to point B without the help of a tow truck. They use sign language to let you know what they think of your efforts.
Didn’t bother me any, but it did cost me two hours.
So, now I am faced with the task of bridging the main character from my first book, Karl, into the second book. Actually, it should be simple because I am writing about the following events from memory. But it is a bit challenging because I also have to introduce two new characters.
You would think that this is easy, wouldn’t you? Well, not exactly. One of the new characters appears right away. But the motives for his actions, as well as his personal reasons for interacting with Karl, (while important) are a bit difficult to describe. I might pull it off, by writing in chronological order, but, I am not exactly sure about it.
It was confusing enough at the time when the events unfolded. So far I am at chapter 2, but, I rewrote already chapter 1 several times and now Chapter 2 is out of kilter……….
Thanks For Your Help
Well, as of last night my first book has been published on Amazon and is available on Kindle. The writing itself was kind of easy because I was writing from memory. However, the publishing was a different thing altogether and I could not have done it by myself. First I had to find an editor.
I had some well meaning offers from some of my friends, but then we somehow lost contact and so I decided to retain a professional. Since English is my second language I knew that I also need a proof reader.
By sheer luck I found ‘Wanda’ of “Desert Transcription” who was extremely supportive. With her many corrections and also with her pertinent questions, she made it possible for me to write what I was trying to convey. Not an easy task, I assure you. But, she did it and I am very thankful for her support.
Next, I was wondering about what kind of software I needed to buy and what I needed to learn about the publishing process.
Everyone I asked about it assured me how easy it was nowadays to get published on Amazon. Maybe it is for someone who is completely computer literate, but there were also accounts to create and many other things. All in all I realized that I had a steep learning curve ahead which did not exactly scare me, but I just wanted to write my story.
So, I stumbled around and while I declined the well meaning offers from friends I found the professional services from “Zenith Business Solutions“. The owner of this company, a lady by the name of Chris, turned out to be exactly what I was looking for. She offered to format my book, create my web site, (the one you are reading right now) establish my accounts with Amazon, provide the copyright symbol, and finally publish the book. She also offered to do the promotion for my book. But most of all she offered all the above, just like Wanda, for an extremely reasonable fee. Oh, I almost forgot her services also included the creation of the book cover.
Actually, their services are for me as a writer, invaluable. I mean, what price tag can I set on the time I saved? Plus, why should I reinvent the wheel?
So, here I am, happy to be a first time published author and unencumbered by the publishing details, ready to write the next books.
First Book – Almost Done
Well, I think that I finished writing my first book. Yesterday, on Sunday, I finished the last chapter. I will let it “sit” for a day and review it before I send it on to my editor.
I also reviewed the whole book and I find that there are many things that I could have added or written differently. However, if I do that , then the book will never be finished. I am afraid that I could rewrite it until the cows come home and still would not be 100 % satisfied. So, I think that I will publish it the way it is and will try to do better with my next book.
You know by now that my first book is about “Karl” and his experiences before the surrender of Berlin in 1945. The next book will cover the following days. Some of the events were very horrific and at this time I wonder how much I’ll be able to “write” about it. But, since all the things I write about are based upon my own experiences, I think that I will simply keep on writing. Should my memory becomes too disturbing (for me) I will take a deep breath and stop for a day or two.
Thinking back, I feel that there where two distinctly different periods of events which might be of interest to my readers. This is the reason that I choose to write two books instead of just one. But, right now, it is time for me to celebrate the finish of my first book and I will do so by cooking a bunch of noodles in milk and then put plenty of sugar and cinnamon on top of it….my favorite food besides potatoes. No, please don’t tell me about the benefits of vegetables….even my dogs don’t like them.
Remembering vs Reliving ?
So, here I am writing about 1945, a time frame that was 68 years ago and I “discovered” a few interesting things. They are interesting because they are very real and I did not have a clue about them when I started my book. Please give me some leeway here, when I struggle a bit to bring my point across.
The start of the book was very simple in that I have a good memory and I had also some old notes regarding dates and places. So I started writing…. And here is what I discovered:
When you or I think back at something that occurred a while ago something happens in our brain to bring the event back to the forefront. Somehow we “inspect” the former incident. When we talk about it, we sometimes say things like: “In retrospect”, well, you know what I mean. For the lack of a better word I call this memory recall: “Harmless”.
I talked very often to my family, my friends and others about WWII and my experiences, and none of these conversations ever affected me in any shape or form. However, now as I write about it something very different happens to me. I am starting to “relive” events and happenings which were somehow depressed or at least forgotten.
Here is an example:
In 1944, at the height of the air raids in Berlin, we were about 130 children per classroom. Every Friday morning we had two minutes of silence in which we stood with our heads bent and remembered the parents, relatives or classmates we lost in the previous week. Actually there was not a day where not one of us classmates did not lost a loved one. My original class of 128 children in 1943 shrank to 22 children in 1944. Some of us had been ‘evacuated’ Some of us were simply missing. But, most of my classmates died due to the bombing attacks.
There was never any counseling for us. Two minutes of remembrance, once a week, was good enough. The phrase we always heard was: “It is total war..get over it.”
Later on, 20, 30, or 40 years later, here in the States, I was often asked: “Did you or do you have any nightmares?” No, I never had, yes, I did have horrible memories, but I never thought about them because they were unproductive. And, I don’t think about unproductive things. Well, not much anyway. But, now, writing about these times I find myself actually reliving, (no, re-experiencing is a better word) past events …long forgotten. And let me tell you, it is not funny, sitting by the computer, trying to type while shaking.
Now, am I learning anything from this? I mean anything productive? Well, for one thing, I think that it would be far easier to write about other people than about myself. It follows that it might also be easier to write fiction. However, as for right now, I continue my story to the end.
As for my future, as a writer, I might decide to write fiction. Time will tell….
Finding? The Time To Write
My wife of 41 plus years and I are living on a small ranch (20 acres) in Northern California. We have some sheep, about 16 at the last count and two llamas to protect the sheep from the coyotes. Then we have two large mixed breed herding dogs to protect the llamas from the mountain lions. (No, I don’t know how many mountain lions we have because they are roaming wild in our area and also they don’t belong to us.)
Then we have close to 100 chicken because we like the income from selling the eggs to our neighbors. The chickens run free and “willi nilly” in a 2 acre fenced area. Next we feed over 300 homing pigeons. I write here that we feed them. Not that we own them, because I think that they own us.
When we bought the ranch, it came with 20 of them. Then we saw that they were laying eggs and the little birds were sooo cute ….and then we were feeding 50 of them. Now, 4 years later, we feed over 300… No, we don’t over-feed. We stopped that after the first 50. And in our mind we are only supporting fifty. But, they multiply faster than rabbits and find all the free food in the chicken corrals.
Next to mind come our two large shepherds which earn their keeps by protecting us all. We are also doing some dog boarding for our friends and when my neighbor heard that I was writing a novel he asked me “Where do you find the time?” Well, truth is, as long as I lived I never “found” any time. It always seemed to me that I had the same time as anyone else. No less, no more. If I wanted something done I always “made” the time.
Same here with my writing. I decided to write a book and in order to do so I set my alarm clock to 4:00 am. Bingo, right then and there I “found” or “made” two hours which I did not have before. How simple is that? “Ugh,” my neighbor asked “I understand that, but are you in a mood to write this early in the morning?”
Now you have to remember that I am an old fashioned German. I never think about “my mood” or nonsense like that. The decision to write is already made. The time to write was created by adding two hours in the morning. So, all I have to do is ……..start writing. After the start I continue….. writing…that is. I also “created” some time by simply dropping some unproductive habits. I mean we all have them, we just don’t like to talk about them.
However: “The ugly ones know who they are!”.
Don’t we?
Hmm, yes, when someone asks what the sheep are good for?
We change the subject.
